There is a saying I have been quoting lately on Facebook by Leonardo da Vinci- “Learn how to see. Realize that everything is connected to everything else.” I learned that lesson again yesterday.
During my radiation treatments, I did a series of mixed media prints called Bubbles of Optimism which I decided to give to some of the doctors I have worked so closely with this year. I hadn’t had time to drop off the one to Dr. Marisa Weiss, my radiation oncologist, until yesterday, December 31. I haven’t been back to Lankenau Hospital since I finished my radiation treatment. I drove up and as I turned into the driveway, I felt myself tense up and feel kind of weepy. I left the package with the secretary.
By the time I got into the garage, I was a wreck. I did hold it together until I got back into the car and then I fell apart. Where did all this emotion come from? Why was I so sad and crying??? I was on my way to coffee with a dear high school friend Susan who I haven’t seen for a while but who I know forever. In fact, she and I went on our first grand tour of Europe together in 1965!! We don’t see each other often enough but when we get together we can talk about everything and we do! Our coffee lasted for hours!
What I found out this time was that Susan had breast cancer three times. I only knew about the one major time- stage 3/4, not the other 2 which she kept secret. So we talked and talked about everything, this time including our cancers, not just books, movies and our kids. She was exactly the right person to meet after dropping off that present.
The end of the year, coffee with a dear friend, drop off a present….everything is related.
Bubbles of Optimism 1, 2, 3, mixed media by Linda Dubin Garfield
There is a saying I have been quoting lately on Facebook by Leonardo da Vinci- “Learn how to see. Realize that everything is connected to everything else.” I learned that lesson again yesterday.
During my radiation treatments, I did a series of mixed media prints called Bubbles of Optimism which I decided to give to some of the doctors I have worked so closely with this year. I hadn’t had time to drop off the one to Dr. Marisa Weiss, my radiation oncologist, until yesterday, December 31. I haven’t been back to Lankenau Hospital since I finished my radiation treatment. I drove up and as I turned into the driveway, I felt myself tense up and feel kind of weepy. I left the package with the secretary.
By the time I got into the garage, I was a wreck. I did hold it together until I got back into the car and then I fell apart. Where did all this emotion come from? Why was I so sad and crying??? I was on my way to coffee with a dear high school friend Susan who I haven’t seen for a while but who I know forever. In fact, she and I went on our first grand tour of Europe together in 1965!! We don’t see each other often enough but when we get together we can talk about everything and we do! Our coffee lasted for hours!
What I found out this time was that Susan had breast cancer three times. I only knew about the one major time- stage 3/4, not the other 2 which she kept secret. So we talked and talked about everything, this time including our cancers, not just books, movies and our kids. She was exactly the right person to meet after dropping off that present.
The end of the year, coffee with a dear friend, drop off a present….everything is related.
Bubbles of Optimism 1, 2, 3, mixed media by Linda Dubin Garfield
Now that I am a member of the Cancer Club, I am very aware of other members and keep watch on how they are doing. I am always hopeful and am glad when news is good and they are doing well. Often I do not get to see people for a while and do not know what is going on. Then suddenly I hear bad news and I am taken by surprise. Those in the know are not surprised because things changed and have not been going well for a while, but I did not know.
While we were in Houston visiting our son and family this weekend, a lovely women Audrey Whitman died from lung cancer. I knew she had cancer but wasn’t even sure exactly which was the primary kind. When I went to see her husband Paul sitting shiva today, he had handouts about lung cancer which were very informative. On November 5, 2012, the same day Audrey left Hahnemann Hospital, an article appeared in the Philadelphia Inquirer, written by Bridget Huber entitled The Neglected Cancer. She starts by stating that lung cancer kills more people than any other cancer. This year it will kill about 160,340 Americans, more than breast, colon and prostate cancers combine. Yet, while lung cancer remains a death sentence- just 15.6% of those diagnosed are alive in 5 years, the federal government funds far less research on the disease than on other common cancers.
There seems to be a stigma of smoking to blame for this. that stigma keeps some families and patients from speaking out. In fact, an estimated 15% of lung cancers are diagnosed in people who never smoked. If lung cancer in people who never smoked were considered a separate disease, it would still be the 6th-leading cancer killer in the United States, ahead of liver, ovarian, and esophageal cancers. Here’s hoping for a cure for all cancers!
Audrey was an energetic and dynamic women who added light and sparkle to the world. Our community is dimmed by her loss.
I am glad to see 2012 end since it has been a year of disease and treatment. Breast cancer was discovered through a routine mammogram on May 26, I found out the biopsy was positive on June 4, the surgery was July 11 and I have been finished the radiation treatment since October 4. The problems with burning are totally gone. The surgical issues are almost all gone. I still feel twinges (and sometimes pangs, rarely stabs) and truth be told the right breast is not the same as the other. It is achier and there is some skin discoloration but it seems to be fading so maybe it will disappear.
I take Arimidex everyday and will for 5 years. Now they are talking about Tamoxifen for 10 years. I do not know if that will be the case for me too. So far, I feel no side effects but they did say it takes a while and I only started taking the drug October 11. I usually tolerate drugs fairly well so I am hoping not to have a problem. I had a dexascan for a baseline since this drug can thin your bones. Every drug has side effects.
Today I had an endoscopy and a colonoscopy and both were clean so I am feeling great!!
I look forward to 2013 with hope! Wishing you all a happy and healthy new year!
On Monday night I went to the 35th Anniversary Celebration of BeatCancer.org which is the website for the Center for Advancement in Cancer Education. Started in 1977 by Dr. Susan Silberstein, their mission is provide research based education on how to prevent, cope with, and beat cancer through diet, lifestyle and other immune boosting approaches.
I had read so much about Susan Silberstein and heard her years ago, way before cancer struck close to home, I decided to meet her and support her organization at their anniversary party. I met many board members and staff as well as Susan herself. Her focus is prevention not a cure for cancer. The organization has trained more than 50,000 prevention-seekers in the US and Canada. They have presented continuing education education to 1000’s of doctors, nurses and other healthcare professionals as well as provided individual coaching and counseling to nearly 30,000 cancer patients nationwide on a donation basis. It has been a busy 35 years!!
Her latest book Hungrier for Health is filled with vegan, kosher and tasty recipes that are nutritious and delicious!! The programs focus on building the body up, not just destroying the tumor. I found the evening informative and the people friendly and knowledgeable.
Susan’s mantra is Prevention is the cure! Sounds like a good plan to me. What do you think?
I went back to Lankenau Hospital for my 4 week check up with Dr Marisa Weiss last week. What a difference these last weeks have made. My skin is so much better! I have no burning and, except for some discoloration and a slight redness at both scar sites, there is little change. Occasionally I will feel pangs or stabs of pain but they are sudden and temporary and do not linger, nor happen very often. She seemed pleased and doesn’t need to see me until August.
I have been thinking about the question of the glass being half full or half empty. How do you view it? or life? When I apply the analogy to my cancer situation, I say the glass is full because I only had stage one, it was caught early; I am lucky that I did not need chemo; after 6 months, I am cancer free. The glass is half empty because, who needed cancer in the first place; radiation treatment was no picnic; I have to take Arimidex for 5 years and it has significant side effects.
After quite a bit of thought I have come to realize that the real answer to the conundrum is that the glass is both empty and full at the same time. That’s it! Both is the right answer. It is both and you choose to focus on one or the other. At times you may focus on the negative or the positive, but my having a positive outlook helps me heal and move forward- so I look at the water, not the air and take a deep breath. It will help me in the long run in most, if not all, situations so I do it as much as I can.
What about you?
Since I was diagnosed in May, and treated this July through October, this is my first October Cancer Awareness month as a cancer survivor. I am on the inside of the pink attack this year. In the past, I noticed it some, but this year I experienced an avalanche. Is it me or did things explode?? Evey magazine I picked up had pages of articles containing valuable information, touching stories of young survivors fighting valiant battles or even more touching stories of women losing them. Every company was selling something pink. Athletes wore pink something on the fields and in their arenas.
The major newspapers ran serious articles informing the public about current research, creating dialogue everywhere including doctors’ offices which is really good. Awareness was raised everyday at all levels. I did not mind the pinkness of it all. You can buy the products or not, wear the kitsch or not. Having it available is good for the cause. It brings the topic to the forefront.
But I now know how African Americans feel in February when Black History month comes around and teachers cram facts about contributions and history into a month instead of integrating into the curriculum throughout the year. I certainly hope they are not still doing that!
My question is what is going to happen to breast cancer awareness on November 1?
When I got the results of the biopsy way back in May, I also was told that my tumor was estrogen positive and HER negative which was Greek to me. What I have found out since is that estrogen feeds some tumors and it is good if you are positive because then you can take a pill to block the estrogen from going to the cells which would prevent cancer from recurring, or at least improve the chances of it not recurring.
Hormonal therapy, sometimes also called anti-estrogen therapy, works by lowering the amount of estrogen in the body or blocking estrogen from attaching to the breast cancer cells.
You and your doctor (mine is Dr David Mintzer , a wonderful medical oncologist at Pennsylvania Hospital, work together to decide which form of hormonal therapy is best in your particular situation. Tamoxifen is the most commonly used to treat breast cancer but it is used when you have a uterus or before menopause.
Aromatase inhibitors stop the production of estrogen in postmenopausal women. Aromatase inhibitors work by blocking the enzyme aromatase, which turns the hormone androgen into small amounts of estrogen in the body. This means that less estrogen is available to stimulate the growth of hormone-receptor-positive breast cancer cells. Aromatase inhibitors can’t stop the ovaries from making estrogen, so these medications only work in postmenopausal women. The main sources of the hormone for those women are the adrenal glands and fat tissue, not the ovaries. Aromatase inhibitors include Arimidex (chemical name: anastrozole), Aromasin (chemical name: exemestane), and Femara (chemical name: letrozole)
There are serious side effects. When I asked my dear friend Ruthie who took it about 8-9 years ago what the side effects are, she said, “The first side effect is that you live!! Focus on that and don’t worry about the rest.”
Good advice. Maybe I will be lucky and not get the others- severe joint pain, bone thinning, vomiting, hot flashes, weakness and fatigue to name a few. Yuck!! I am supposed to take anastrozole for 5 years!!! Barring any problems, that is the plan and I am sticking to it.
I got my pre-induction notification on May 25, 2012 when I got a mammogram that showed a shadow that was not there last year and needed to be biopsied to check it out. I definitely got inducted into the force on June 4 when I got the results of the biopsy which confirmed that the enemy had invaded my breast and had to be destroyed!! I had invasive lobular carcinoma and had a lumpectomy to remove all cancerous cells on July 11. To further insure a positive outcome, I had radiation therapy for 7 weeks which killed any renegade cells which happened to hang around.
The battle is long and furious since the healthy cells have to suffer the radiation as well, not to mention the breast tissue and exterior skin. Oy!! But radiation ended 2 weeks ago and right after, I went on R and R like all good soldiers do! The first week, I went to Houston, Texas where we celebrated the last days of Succos, the days of joy and harvest ending the High Holidays that began with Rosh HaShanah. How nice to be with my son and his family! I did no cooking thanks to my wonderful daughter-in-law Rochella (first days I did not cooking either thanks to Elana, my other wonderful daughter-in-law) and played games with my grandchildren.
The next week I went to Rhode Island for 4 days to be with my sister Barbara. We played Scrabble, watched movies and laughed and talked as only sisters can. It was so relaxing and healing! I was supposed to be there for her since she had minor surgery a week ago, but it ended up we were there for each other. She could drive and we just took it easy and had a restful and relaxing time.
Joining the forces to fight the enemy Cancer takes energy and courage but you have no choice. You just do it!! Battle after battle, step after step, and take the respites as they come… giving yourself treats along the way. I get a massage a month now. But these last two weeks of R and R, of being away, since I could not go away because I had to go to radiation treatment 5 times a week, were just what the doctor didn’t order and just what I needed!!
In a week I am on to the next step and the next phase of treatment. More about that later…
After 33 radiation treatments, on October 4 I had my last treatment and rang the bell to declare I am finished with this stage of my cancer treatment!! What a great feeling. All the radiation therapists lined up and hugged me and I hugged them. After 7 weeks we know each other well. In some ways, I will miss going in and seeing them in the morning first thing. In other ways, I will not miss it at all! I also got to know the other patients who came in around my time. We are in the club no one wants to be in! But once you are in, you are supportive and caring of other members.
I am really suffering from burns in the scar area. The last 8 sessions were specific to where the cancer was and it is really red and sore. I am putting prescription creams on 4 times a day and thanks to the suggestions of others got Aquafor as well to calm down the burning. The redness under my arm where the scar from the lymph node surgery is has gotten slightly better. I am hoping that in a week or so the other scar will do the same. Meanwhile it is really seriously uncomfortable, bordering on painful.
The night of October 4, Norman and I got on a plane to Houston to spend almost a week with our grandchildren (and their parents) who we had not seen since July. Even though my energy level is not what it usually is, I am still enjoying being here. Just taking lots of naps in between games and excursions.
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